My goals for the new year seem a good way to start. Number one is don't eat inedible substances, a rule I already violated when I tasted the Christmas tree this morning. Have you ever thought something smelled so delicious that you just had to taste it? Well, that was me with the tree. And it failed to live up to expection, not to mention getting Mom and Dad miffed at me. Why do I, an intelligent being, do such things? Because instinct trumps thought process in order of application. Some times instinct can be a good thing. I know a bad person just by their touch. But for me, instinct turned impulse is a bad thing more of the time. To bolt across a parking lot because the restaurant sign speaks to my too empty stomach, to have smell direct action ill-advised, to have anxiety override your reason: these are the impulses that destroy my functioning as normal-looking and place me in dangerous situations. It blocks my development of selfmanagement skill and my independent functioning. It is a life of telling myself to stop and think, and think again. I am an idiot savant subject to uncontrollable impulses. I need to train myself to yield. It is my primary goal for this year.
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